my life.

I don't like homework. not that anyone does.. but sometimes my depression kicks in hard core and its not that i dislike homework the normal teenage amount. its that i really dont feel like i have the physical ability to do my work. this generally leads to me thinking about what crazy thing to do to my hair next, what to pierce, and what tattoos i want. so today was a tattoo designing kind of day. i have lots of ideas. but one is a girl dancing in the rain with her umbrella on my forearm. these arekinda along the lines of what i want, mine will have one storm cloud with rain and then the girl. nothing else. maybe a puddle hahah.

also im thinking about getting two wires (like telephone wires) on my wrist with a bird sitting on one and another bird flying away (yea its cause of the regina spektor song) or the lyrics "the world can be ugly but isn't it beautiful" from there, there katie on my wrist.  also im getting 'the rose that grew from concrete' on my left side ribcage area. there will be lots more im sure. but i gotta do some homework now...

December. and 2010 recap.

December:  I have officially gotten into college! i still have to hear from my other schools and all that jazz-but its really nice to know that a college actually wants me!
we also had some good snow this december. got out of school the last two days before break AND it snowed on christmas! that was super cool.
christmas was great this year. we watched a ghost adventures marathon christmas eve and the shining on christmas day. not the conventional way to spend christmas but nothing about my family is very conventional. there was like zero fighting this christmas and my tacky matching shirts went over well. even oscar loved his!
i have also done a lot of shopping this week which makes it a little more exciting to go back to school in a few days.. ugh senioritis is hitting hard! the thought of exams is killing me. but theres only six more months of highschool! its ridiculously hard to believe.
2010! Recap.
2010 has been a good year for the most part. junior year ended-always good. Italy was the best time of my entire life. i always look at those pictures and end up like almost crying i miss it so much. everyone should go on a trip like that if they are given the chance. so far senior year has been pretty chill. easyish classes and lots of time to spend with all my friends. it makes me realize how much im gonna miss everyone next year. well maybe not everyone... but a lot of people.
there were some super shitty parts to this year. no doubt about that. but the worst parts of my life are better than the best parts of many other peoples lives. the shitty things happened, and more will happen in the future, but all i can do is accept them and move on. hopefully college will be as awesome as im expecting and will make up for how crappy highschool is. seriously. people who make those cliche highschool movies should be shot. highschool was nothing like any of those movies. instead it was like a freddy krueger dream you couldnt wake up from. only a few more months til i get to wake up.. thank god.

I can't wait for all the great things in the year ahead: 18th birthday! graduation! college! and lots of things i cant even anticipate! new years isnt that big of a deal to me though.. at midnight it will just be tomorrow. hit me up when we survive 2012 though. thatll be something to celebrate.

SOO busy.

The last few weeks have been so busy! Visiting Arkansas, applying to schools, family crisis, thanksgiving and the beach!

Arkansas was definitely an experience. There isn't a lot to do down there, but the school was great. Hendrix is small but its tightknit just like i wanted. and they seem to have a lot going on to balance out the nothing that goes on in Conway. I stayed with a really nice freshman who showed me around everywhere. The girls dorms are super nice! but its so far away im just not sure that i could do it. especially because we had some family stuff going on at home while we were gone. i loved the school but i dont think that i could stand being away from my family when shit likethat happens.

I have applied to all my colleges though! one more supplement to do! and then its out of my hands. its really exciting to be done, but also really scary. although i definitely have a top and bottom choice, if i dont get in ill just take the year off like i had planned before. im trying not to stress out about it, and so far so good!

I just got home today from the beach with Caitie's family. It was so much fun. we took naps everyday but one i think, and went shopping at midnight of black friday! that was awesome. some of the lines were super long but i got 5 new pairs of converse for 60 bucks! it was awesome. i know have, i believe, 12 pairs :) its an obsession. oh well. while we were at the beach we saw burlesque and morning glory. morning glory was good but pretty cliche. burlesque however, was fricking amazing. i have no idea how christina aguilera sings like that or how any of them dance like that, but i sure as hell want to try. it looks like so much fun! i cannot wait to see that movie again. we also watched a life less ordinary which was super funny but unneccessarily weird.. the beach is one of my favorite places in the world! and it was the perfect place to be for thanksgiving!

:)

Halloween was so much fun! My outfit looked awesome, my friends looked awesome, Anna's halloween party for the youth group turned out great, and I finally got to see Caitie!
Now I just can't wait for Thanksgiving to get here so I can go to Rehoboth with Caitlin's familia. It will be so much fun, like always.
This weekend I'm roadtripping to Arkansas with my mom for a college visit. Should be quite the adventure seeing as I've never been to Arkansas. But I am very excited!!! The school looks great on paper so hopefully it's great in real life too!

Senioritis is starting to kick in way hard core. I just want to graduate and be done with highschool forever. Although, I actually will miss a lot of people from my school.... but the school itself I won't miss too much haha. It still feels weird to be a senior.. I don't feel that old at all. But soon I'll be a legal adult and living away from home and all that jazz. It is soo strange.

I went to church today for the first time in a very very long time. But it was nice. I don't really have classifiable religios beliefs, I just have my own special ones, but being in a church environment is so calming. The people are so nice and always happy to see someone new(ish) around, and its more time I get to spend with dumb dumb sister haha.

There is probably a lot more for me to write on here, but I can't think of it and I have a Latin postcard to make! wooohooo

halloween, winter sports, and some random stuff

So halloween is this weekend! yay! im dressing up as ke$ha for school on friday :) i cant wait. i bought a bunch of glitter stuff but i still gotta get my costume together. its gonna be so much fun! then on saturday im probably doing this volunteering thing at school, and then helping anna set up for her youth group halloween party. and on halloween im going to watch movies with caitie :) its going to be an awesome weekend. i love halloween!

wrestling starts soon which i am super siked about! although also kind of nervous because i dont even know how many people are actually on the team haha... we shall seee how that goes. swimming also starts  soon.. but thats not very exciting. i just do it to not be fat. haha. and we have a different pool this year so practice is 15 minutes earlier. and farther away. meaning i have to wake up earlier. not cool. hahah.

also i have decided, mostly, that i am not taking a year off before college, and ill probably go to a school that no one in my family has been to. im going to arkansas in a few weeks to look at a college haha. i hope i like it. cause it looks great online so i hope its as good in reality. arkansas is a really random ass place but that could be just what  i need.

we filmed the first scene of our dig vid group project today!! that was so exciting! thank you to all the extras who helped out. im sorry if you were tired or bored but you were such a huge help! i cannot wait to continue making our film. also today, i sound like a frigging fog horn haha. i have no voice. it sucks because i cannot sing and that makes me go crazy.

i have to go make bloody candles :) hahah this should be fun!

PEP RALLY

okay. so besides the fact that we didnt win, which was obviously a let down,there were some good and bad things about today.
pep rallies are supposed to be about school pride, but really all that happened today was people got angry and bad mouthed each other and the administration. (myself included. this is not a holier than thou post.) instead of building each other up, and being excited about the grades other than our own, we boo each other and wreck decorations. i know its all in good fun and stuff-and once again im certainly guilty- but its not really the point of pep rallies and school spirit week. oh well. it is fun at the start at least. like working as a class to decorate! which leads into my good thing about today.
our class has never been the most outgoing class in terms of spirit, and i was really worried about how we would be as a senior class. and even though we didnt win, we did a really great job of working together to buy supplies and decorate the commons. our class is generally very clique-y and those cliques certainly didnt just disappear, but the lines became much more blurred as everyone worked together for a common cause. i was very impressed to see how well we decorated, even if we caused safety violations and had to redo almost everything...
ALSO
we have the sweetest senior shirts ever. love them. its kind of countering what i said earlier because i think that, while pep rallies are supposed to be about school spirit versus class spirit, when you're a senior it really helps your class spirit more. having a senior shirt that almost everyone wears. and being the top dog in school is awesome. mw and i have our differences. and my class and i do too. but i still enjoy being unified for this one day.
SENIORS 2011. the chosen ones.

update.

so... fall festival was kind of a let down this year... maybe i just set my hope too high, although it lived up to them every other year, but either way it wasnt great. i had a cold, and all my friends were on different schedules of when they were there and if they were working booths so my group didnt get to be together too much.. but thats okay. i still got to see my friends who graduated last year!

tomorrow is our first pep rally as SENIORS!!!!!! CLASS OF 2011 WHAT UP?!
i hope that we pull it off as the best senior class so far!!! i bought some streamers and ballons and table cloths today. and im hoping the fact that my target was sold out of most things in blue means that someone already bought it! i got some blue tights too :) and our senior shirts actually got here on time! cant wait to get that in the morning! this pep rally is going to be soooo great. im really excited to see how our class does as seniors. and that we get the big section of the auditorium hahhaha so we dont have to be all up on each other all the time! I LOVE BEING A SENIORRR